Seeing as you, my loyal readers don’t like the delayed posts (boo you), I am smooshing them all into one post! So pop your feet up, grab a cuppa and get ready for some short and sweet updates that when added together will form an encyclopedia of all things “cycle number 4”.

Wednesday 16th November

We have jumped back on the rollercoaster IVF ride. I am now at day 16 of my cycle. As I have been on holidays until yesterday, there has been no surge-ometer tests, scans or blood tests. At 5 something this morning, I begrudgingly lugged myself out of bed and into the city for a scan and bloods.

Scan revealed nothing on the LHS and not one but 2 x 19mm follicles on the right hand side! Thank god hubby has had the snip… Lining is a nice, snuggly 12mm. The perfect mattress for any embryo. Bloods revealed no surge as yet, so it is back for bloods on Friday!

I am nervous about this transfer already. I feel like I don’t want to get too excited because then I wont be as upset if it doesn’t work. But on the flipside, I owe it to KiT/CaT’s little frostie to give it all I got and send as many positive vibes its way as possible. Self preservation vs. all in. Tough call.

Pretty confident transfer will fall on my 1st day back after 2 weeks off work. Oh the joy! How the hell do I explain that one to the boss? !

So we are on the countdown. All booze is consumed. Chocolate at the ready.

Thursday 17th December


Busy day today! Although I am home from holidays, I don’t go back to work till Monday, so today I took the opportunity to:

  • Catch up on paperwork/forms/pay bills
  • Have a run- intervals with hubby. Fun!
  • Do pre prep transition with miss 5.5
  • Get a blood test to confirm SURGE (of course!)
  • Do 100 loads of washing to dry in this beautiful sunshine (load volume may be slightly exaggerated)
  • Take the dog to the vet for a check up
  • Finally make a start on uni work!

Blood results didn’t come back before COB so I will get them tomorrow. PLEASE confirm the surge. PLEASE!

Friday 28th November

Ugh. What a day. Slightly overwhelmed with all the rigmarole that is this cycle.

Clinic called this morning. Results STILL NOT IN. Then they told me that they need to do serology tests every 3 months so I needed to go back for bloods today anyway (sigh). So off to the gym I went. Then ducked into the shopping centre and off to the GP for a follow up appointment. No call from the clinic so I head home for lunch. I called the clinic again to see about results. Nothing. So we decided to pop the tests on the path request again, just in case. Headed to the collection centre. Closed for lunch. Great. Saw the bloods pick up man on the way out, so have missed that lab run. Go to 2 chemists to find hayfever eye drops. Head back to path. Get jabbed for the 7th time in 3 days. Clinic literally rang as the 3rd tube was being taken but I missed the call. Back home. 2 more loads of washing and some organising for the kids sleep over tonight (we have a surrogacy support dinner planned).

At this stage, I am feeling a little overwhelmed. This cycle doesn’t feel smooth and easy like the last ones. It feels frantic and rushed and in disarray. I have 2 weeks of uni to catch up on from when we were on holidays and an assessment due Monday. I have a bit of a woe is me moment.

Then the clinic calls. Yesterdays bloods are finally in. LH is 64- indicating a surge. Progesterone is 3.5 which is great. Transfer is this Sunday! Sooooo relieved I don’t have to transfer on my first day back at work! I am cautiously optimistic but don’t have the same excitement levels as previous transfers. Probably to be expected.

So bring on lucky number 4. We need you number 4.

Sunday 20th November

And we are PUPO again!

Meet Mishka! (Means “bear cub” in Russian and is a note to today’s FS who did the transfer. It is also a brand of Vodka so its a winning name I think!).


What a nice little clump of cells! Dividing nicely.

Pregnyl this Tuesday, then another jab later in the week (cant remember when lol) and BT on the 2nd December!

We hope the stars align for us this time. Today in my past FB feed posts, I realised that today was the day last year that we officially “proposed” my uterus to KiT/CaT! I hope that the universe gives us some extra luck because of this very reason.

Fingers, toes and legs crossed.


Tuesday 22nd November

This morning I gave MYSELF a pregnyl injection! I was so nervous I was shaking lol

It didn’t take long for my first symptom to appear:


That is all.


Wednesday 23rd November



Sunday 27th November

There has been plenty to keep me occupied this far during the 2ww. Parties, work, kids, study. I have managed to keep it together so far. But today I have been feeling some subtle signs of AF making its arrival. I am day 27, so period is due any day now. I so hope its not. I really do.

Trying to keep positive…


Wednesday 30th November

Still got cramping but no AF. Starting to think we can kiss this cycle goodbye. Bloods Friday but I think AF will arrive before then.


Friday 2nd December

Would you believe that we made it to bloods with no AF?! Still feeling like it will arrive though. I haven’t been nervous about this cycle because I have been convinced that its not going to work. But today?! Nervous. As. Hell. Clock watching every 5 minutes.


Saturday 3rd December

Well. Um…. The clinic has said that we are not pregnant but we haven’t had a failed cycle either! Hcg reading is 22. Not enough to class it as a positive but it doesn’t mean that it is a negative either. #headscrew

Back for more bloods on Monday to see if little Mishka is a sticky. We are trying to keep everything crossed that the embie is just a late implanter! This limbo isn’t unfamiliar to me as it is what happened when we had the transfer for Ethan.

KiT/CaT are AMAZING! They are looking at the positives that at this stage, we are pregnant and that this is the furthest we have ever got out of 4 transfers! I hope this is the one for all of us. We need for this one to be a sticky. Come on, Mishka, grow, grow, grow!


Sunday 4th December

Mishka was not to be. I will just leave it at that.



4 thoughts on “Updates!

  1. Renee – another disappointment for you guys, I am so sorry. It truly sucks.
    You got one step furthest this time though! That’s promising! I hope so much that it’s a sign of things to come.
    So much love to you all.

    Maggie xxxxx


  2. Renee and team,i am lost for words right now.
    I am so sorry to hear this news and was so excited when i saw your post hoping this was it.
    Keep your chin up and try and stay as positive as you can at this time.
    I will be thinking of you all that is for sure.
    This journey sure is one hell of a roller coaster for sure.


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