Once upon a time there lived a surrogate (Princess) and her family (the Prince and the 3 terror-dwarfs). After experiencing the joy that was creating a family, the Prince, Princess and 3 terror-dwarfs considered offering the Princesses’ uterus to another couple (the Knight and the Lady) in the hope of making their dreams come true.
In late 2015, the Prince and Princess proposed a baby-making toast to the Knight and Lady who gratefully accepted.
In early 2016, the Prince, Princess, Knight and Lady slayed many dragons:
- independent counselors
- The Patient Review Panel
- stupid people
After their hard-fought defeats, they commenced transferring embryos in mid 2016. But alas, a child was not to be conceived and even after the Princess had surgery and pricked her body with many spindle like needles, the last embryos, transferred in early 2017 did not take.
After much time passed in the Kingdom, the Knight and Lady were thrilled to have received an offer of eggs in mid-late 2017 from the beautiful and kind-hearted Countess of Ovaries. The Countess of Ovaries commenced medications which were not nice to her body and twice her egg pick ups were thwarted by the evilness that is “IVF the Unpredictable” which resulted in zero embryos being made. In the meantime, the once kind, now evil “PRP the Horrible” showed no graciousness in their flexibility and the menacing corporate giant “IVF Clinic that shall provide false hope” wanted to rob the Knight and the Lady of many more gold pieces with no guarantee of an heir.
It was during this time of unknown that the patient Princess and Prince decided that the Princesses uterus could not be placed into a slumber/holding pattern forever and without the implantation of an embryo (I was going to talk about that being a true love’s kiss but that would sound kinda icky), it was decided that a deadline would be set for the 30th June 2018. If no royal duffing was to occur by that date, all parties would walk away, gracious/frustrated/saddened at our defeat against the fertility dragons.
One last glimmer of hope was identified in early 2018 as the Prince, Princess, Knight and Lady continued to traverse the scary surrogacy forest together. After seeking counsel from the courts (not a real one) and many a jester, the Princess decided to offer up her own eggs for fertilisation by the Knight- a decision that was not made out of desperation but one out of much consideration.
The Knight and Lady, temporarily thwarted by such an offer, took time in their castle to ponder such a proposal and it was eventually decided that it was not to be.
As such, this is where the surrogacy journey ends for the Prince and Princess, Knight and Lady, defeated by the fertility dragon and unwilling to go another round.
For now, they spend time in their respective castles, pondering what has been, what will come and what never will be.
The gratefulness of the Prince, Princess, Knight and Lady to one another individually, as couple and as a team cannot be stated in words. Instead, it will be highlighted by a mourning (read: drinking) session held in the coming month to celebrate that which will never defeat us: Friendship.
And so, after some time for reflection, mourning, drinking and planning, they will all eventually live happily ever after. This will take longer for some as further battles are forged and eventually won. The Princess has also decided that her uterus will now be placed into retirement, never to carry an heir/spawn for the rest of its days. It has served her well and will be honoured with the title “Dam(e) Uterus”.
The Prince, Princess, Knight and Lady would like to thank the commoners, townspeople and members of royalty who supported them through their epic battles. Whilst this is not the happy ending that they all anticipated, they will prevail and continue to collectively rule on high for the rest of their days.
Disclaimer: there is no mention of unicorns in this tale because THEY DON’T EXIST!